At a time when I should be talking about the new release of "I've Been Deader," the fact that it is number six in horror on the Amazon Free In Kindle Store, even as I type, and the pending release date for the prequel, "Take A Breather," I have for some reason decided to talk about politics.
Specifically, I want to discuss the Obama Administration's failure to form an adequate contingency plan for a zombie apocalypse.
We've wasted billions and billions and -- well, you get the idea -- saving the auto industry, making sure people have health care, and access to Mr. Obama's alleged birth certificate (I'm not saying he wasn't born, but I'm not saying he was either); but not one dime to explore the possibility of surviving a zombie apocalypse.
Fortunately, I have spent several minutes designing a response strategy to an undead immigration problem. It consists of three simple steps:
1. Put the in-laws on the ground floor. This won't help, but it can't hurt.
2. Stock up on batteries, canned goods, and tennis balls. I have it on good authority that zombies love to chase tennis balls.
3. Read "I've Been Deader." It contains no information of value and will help you kill time if not zombies.
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